When Do You “Tell the Truth” During Coaching?

worker-interviewing-female-candidate-about-job-offer

A hallmark of coaching, whether coaching oneself or others, is to ask generative questions — questions to help clarify a current priority, to address the priority and learn at the same time.

However, are there times when a coach should “tell the truth” — to assert the coach’s perspective without the use of questions?

In his seminal book “The Road Less Traveled,” M. Scott Peck writes:

  • “… the act of withholding the truth is always potentially a lie,” … (p. 62)
  • “… the decision to withhold the truth must always be based entirely upon the needs of the person or people from whom the truth is being withheld.” (p. 62)
  • “.. the primary factor in the assessment of another’s needs is the assessment of that person’s capacity to utilize the truth for his or her own spiritual growth.” (p. 63)
He adds (p. 151)
  • “But the reality of life is such that at times one person does know better than the other what is good for the other, and in actuality is in a position of superior knowledge or wisdom in regard to the matter at hand.” (p. 151)
He adds (p. 153)
  • “To fail to confront when confrontation is required for the nurture of spiritual growth represents a failure to love equally as much as does thoughtless criticism or condemnation and other forms of active deprivation of caring.”
In my coaching, I will “tell the truth” if I perceive any of the following — if the client:
  • Speaks of hurting her/himself
  • Speaks of hurting others
  • Does not make progress on his/her priority over numerous coaching sessions
  • Continues to show very strong emotions over numerous sessions

My “truth” might be the strong suggestion that he/she get a professional evaluation from a trained therapist.

What do you think?

For many related, free online resources, see the following Free Management Library’s topics:

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Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD – Authenticity Consulting, LLC – 800-971-2250
Read my blogs: Boards, Consulting and OD, and Strategic Planning.

History of Organization Development (Part 2 of 6) — “The Psychologists”

A group' of colleagues in A Wofk

(Guest post from John Scherer, Co-Director of Scherer Leadership International, with Billie Alban, President of Alban & Williams, Ltd. This is the second blog post in a six-part series about the history of OD.)

Introduction to this Blog Series

  • In our work as OD practitioners, whose shoulders are we standing on?
  • Whose ‘conceptual DNA’ runs in our veins?
  • What are our operating assumptions and where did they come from?

Believe it or not, there was a time when things like involving people in action-planning, group decision-making, action research, feedback, high-performance/high-satisfaction team-development, leadership and management coaching, the stages in the consulting process—and a host of other standard OD practices—did not exist. Who figured them out—and passed them on to us?

You may know some of the people on whose shoulders you are standing, certainly you have read the works of earlier ‘elders’ who have shaped your work, but many of those who developed ways to improve their social systems are lost in the mists of time. . .

NOTE: This site distinguishes the difference between “organizational development” and “Organization Development.” The former phrase refers to the nature and scope of change in organizations, i.e., the change is to the entire organization or to a significant portion of the organization. The latter phrase refers to a field of well-trained people with expertise in guiding successful organizational development.

In the first segment of this series, we looked at some of our ancient ancestors in the practice of OD, going all the way back to ‘Karg’, the Neanderthal hunter who was looking for a way to kill the mastodon without losing so many of his buddies. Thanks to several comments from readers of that segment, let’s say it was ‘Marg’, one of the women around the fire in the cave who stepped forward and made the suggestions regarding longer spears and a better strategy, the first ‘socio-tech’ intervention.

Then there was the ancient story of the Biblical conversation between Moses and his Father-in-Law, Jethro, one of the first recorded ‘executive coaching’ sessions. There were also the Egyptian ‘consulting engineers’ who maintained the Nile’s effectiveness, and even later, the court jesters, who made kings and queens laugh, finding ways to ‘speak truth to power’, affecting decisions from a ‘consulting’ position.

These historical attempts to have more effective organizations were missing several important ingredients, especially the distinction between content (where most of the above ‘consulting’ almost certainly focused) and process (something yet to be discovered). It was up to the unique exploration of more recent minds and hearts to discover and apply the principles that launched what we would recognize today as Organization Development. While many people’s work fed into the formation of our field, as you will see, it was primarily social psychologists (groups and larger systems) and psychologists (individuals and groups) who contributed the most.

In this blog segment we will name some of the psychologists whose thinking contributed their focus on changing individuals to our field, and in the next several segments we will look at ‘The Big Four (or Five)’ from several other fields who more directly shaped OD.

Psychological Branches in Our OD Family Tree

Since 1900, these psychologists have contributed concepts important in shaping our work:

Sigmund Freud (1856-1939), was one of the first to postulate the existence of an inner world that drives what human beings do—something we hold today as obvious as gravity, and his concepts of Superego, Ego and Id led almost directly to Transactional Analysis’ concepts of Parent, Adult and Child.

Carl Jung (1875-1971) postulated the power of archetypes operating in the human psyche and emphasized the role of the Shadow, those aspects of who we are that have not yet been integrated. He also legitimated the world of dreams and intuition and suggested that we were more than rational beings living in a Cartesian or Newtonian world.

Mary Parker Follet (1868-1933) was a community leader and innovative organizer focusing on what happened in groups and how they functioned long before her better-known male colleagues. Although relatively unknown to many in our field, she was a pioneer in both how groups functioned and the key role of leadership in their effectiveness.

B.F. Skinner (1904-1990) took the Russian Ivan Pavlov’s salivating dogs to the next (human) level, theorizing that we are not making free-will decisions at all, but are products of what he called ‘stimulus/response-driven operant conditioning’. His principle: what gets rewarded gets repeated. (Today’s field of Performance Management comes directly from this school of thought.)

Erik Erikson (1902-1994) saw a human being’s life as a developmental journey with predictable ‘epigenetic stages’ or phases that must be successfully traversed in the process of becoming a healthy adult. All the life cycle and developmental models of today owe a debt to his thinking.

Abraham Maslow (1908-1970) showed that what motivates people varies, depending on where they are in their ‘hierarchy of needs’, and that we should be investigating not just ‘sick’ people, but those who are doing ‘well,’ to discover what makes us tick. (Appreciative Inquiry, one of the more recent innovations in OD, is a direct descendant of Maslow in this regard.)

Carl Rogers (1902-1987), along with Maslow, initiated what came to be called Third Force (or Humanistic) Psychology, an alternative to the Operant Conditioning of Skinner and the Psychoanalytical model of Freud. Rogers also showed that increasing people’s effectiveness happened within a relationship between the helper and the helpee, and that the movement toward wholeness was accelerated by empathy rather than advice-giving.

Eric Berne (1910-1970), creator of Transactional Analysis, pioneered the current self-help movement by simplifying the principles of personal effectiveness and making them available to lay people. He saw the role of an internal Adult mediating between the internal Child and Parent, and showed people the ‘Games’ they were playing inside their ‘Life Script.’

But none of these extraordinary people have had more direct impact on the conception, birth and early growth of OD than the next four. Frederick Taylor, the first in chronological order, set the stage; the second and third (Kurt Lewin and Wilfred Bion) developed and applied the principles; and the last (Douglas McGregor), made them available to managers of organizations and the general public. They are also the first names on Billie Alban’s very useful Origins of OD Time-Line. Tune in next time for that time-line—and some fascinating facts about Frederick Taylor, ‘The Father of Scientific Management’.

? What’s your reaction to this history of OD?

Reference List of Books from This Series

For More Resources About Organization Development, see These Free Management Library Topics:

John Scherer is Co-Director of Scherer Leadership International, and Billie Alban is President of Alban & Williams, Ltd. This blog is an adaptation of their chapter in the ‘bible’ of the field of OD, Practicing Organization Development (3rd Edition, 2009, Rothwell, W.J., Stavros, J.M., Sullivan. R.L. and Sullivan, A. Editors). Many colleagues contributed, among them Warner Burke, John Adams, Saul Eisen, Edie Seashore, Denny Gallagher, Marvin Weisbord Juanita Brown and others. They have drawn heavily from Weisbord’s wonderfully rich, easy-to-read, and well-documented description of the origins of the field in Productive Workplaces (1987 and revised in 2012).

The CFC: Choosing Your Leadership Development Team

A team working to achieve development goals

It’s almost spring, and now’s the time to start planning your non-profit’s CFC campaign for the 2012 campaign season.

The best-selling author, Jim Collins, who wrote Good to Great, has five key principles for organizational success; and, in his own words, the single most important principle is to “Get the right people on the bus.”

That means that selecting the right people for your organization or project team is one of the most important tasks of a leader. This, most certainly, applies to your CFC action team, whether they are all paid staff or some combination of paid staff and volunteers.

There are several factors to consider when forming your CFC action team, and in particular deciding who is going to become the project leader. One key question I have my consulting clients’ executive directors ask themselves, as they consider who should be the CFC Team Leader, is:
    “If I need to send one person to a CFC charity fair, who do I
    want representing our non-profit and its mission to the public?”

In addition to deciding upon a team leader for your non-profit’s CFC program, plan on having at least two others involved on a regular basis (and more if warranted):

  • A second person that can also staff the CFC special events including campaign kick-offs and charity fairs.
  • Someone who can answer basic questions about your non-profit’s participation in the CFC, while others are away from the office.
  • Depending up on the nature of your non-profit, it can be very valuable to have someone is part of the program staff as one of the key members of the CFC action team.

While it’s important to have at least one person who is in the office on a regular basis as the lead on your CFC action team, it’s often quite successful to have volunteers who are able to staff the charity fairs as well.

A few years ago the Chesapeake Bay Foundation had one volunteer whose sole activity was to staff charity fairs. As she once quipped to me, “I love helping the environment, but I don’t like getting muddy!”

Planning & Organizing

The team leader will be responsible for the overall planning for the non-profit’s CFC campaign, including deciding what campaign giveaways should be ordered (described in the previous post), as well as planning the communication and awareness generation strategies for the entire year, not just during the solicitation period.

The planning process include both deciding what tasks need to be accomplished, by what date, as well as a review of what worked well in the 2011 campaign (for non-profits already in the CFC), and what areas need improvement or updating for the 2012 campaign.

One item that needs to be periodically updated is your non-profit’s display board that has highlights about what your organization accomplishes. If the pictures haven’t been updated in several years, it’s time!

Annual Reports

Of the 7 Keys to CFC Success, the most important one is Number Seven, “Say Thank You Early and Often!” And, one of the places where you should say thank you is in your printed materials, including annual reports and newsletters.

Since many non-profits are now working on the content of their 2011 annual report, make sure that you include at least a simple thank you to both your CFC donors and to the CFC volunteers who helped raise funds for all of the CFC charities.

In the next post, we’ll take a look at one specific action that you can take in April to increase the awareness of your non-profit in your community.

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During his 25-year career in the Federal sector, Bill Huddleston, The CFC Coach, served in many CFC roles. If you want to participate in the Combined Federal Campaign, maximize your nonprofit’s CFC revenues, or just ask a few questions, contact … Bill Huddleston
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If you would like to comment/expand on the above, or would just like to offer your thoughts on the subject of this posting, we encourage you to “Leave a Reply” at the bottom of this page, click on the feedback link at the top of the page, or send an email to the author of this posting.

History of Organization Development (Part 1 of 6) — “Prehistoric OD”

A-group-of-executives-working-for-the-benefits-of-their-organization.

(Guest post from John Scherer, Co-Director of Scherer Leadership International, and Billie Alban, President of Alban & Williams, Ltd. This is the first blog post in a six-part series about the history of OD.)

Introduction to this Blog Series

  • In our work as OD practitioners, whose shoulders are we standing on?
  • Whose ‘conceptual DNA’ runs in our veins?
  • What are our operating assumptions and where did they come from?

Believe it or not, there was a time when things like involving people in action-planning, group decision-making, action research, feedback, high-performance/high-satisfaction team-development, leadership and management coaching, the stages in the consulting process—and a host of other standard OD practices—did not exist. Who figured them out—and passed them on to us?

You may know some of the people on whose shoulders you are standing, certainly you have read the works of earlier ‘elders’ who have shaped your work, but many of those who developed ways to improve their social systems are lost in the mists of time. . .

NOTE: This site distinguishes the difference between “organizational development” and “Organization Development.” The former phrase refers to the nature and scope of change in organizations, i.e., the change is to the entire organization or to a significant portion of the organization. The latter phrase refers to a field of well-trained people with expertise in guiding successful organizational development.

Pre-Historic OD?

We have no way of knowing, but imagine a group of Neanderthal men, sitting around their fire in the cave, when Karg, a more free-thinking hunter, using whatever grunts and motions he had available, speaks to his buddies. ‘You know, guys, we got the mastodon today, but I wonder how we could kill them without losing so many of us in the process?!’

Now imagine the group dynamics that might have ensued. Assuming that the leader—the fiercest hunter and warrior—allowed this discussion to continue, perhaps another hunter made a suggestion about using longer spears (technology). Maybe one of the more courageous women listening in suggested that a few hunters draw the mastodon’s attention in one direction while the best spear-throwers came at it from the other side (teamwork). Perhaps someone else said, ‘Let’s do both!’ (polarity management). Maybe the shaman suggested that they should all drink the animal’s blood to strengthen people’s ability to hunt (human resources). The result: the world’s first ‘socio-technical OD intervention’.

We would not still be here as a species if learning had not taken place at crucial points in our development. Our ancient ancestors faced real-time, real-world consequences (feedback) on a daily basis and did everything they could to solve life-and-death challenges with a combination of improved technology and smarter teamwork.

Around 10,000 BCE, as humans began to multiply more rapidly and settle down—especially around The Fertile Crescent in what is now Iraq—the tribal social system, which served so well as long as people moved around, began to break down. When humans put down roots to live in one place because of climate, water supply and/or the presence of game, a more complex social system was required. New roles and new forms of organization had to be invented. Now some people had to not hunt or farm, but stay back to guard that which had been garnered. Someone now needed to count quantities and weights and keep track of who got what. Someone had to make decisions and control the group’s effort and direction. (See Jared Diamond’s Guns, Germs and Steel for a fascinating exploration of the rise of civilization and the changing role of leadership.)

The First Consulting Engineers—circa 5,000 BCE

There is evidence that the Egyptian culture during the time of the Pharaohs had what we would call ‘consulting engineers’, whose job it was to go around to the major construction projects and make sure they were ‘on time and under budget.’ When the Nile flooded every year, communication and cooperation all up and down a thousand miles of river was necessary, leading to command and control structures and enforcement capabilities. If one community astride the river failed to maintain their section of the dam or did not channel the water properly, the ensuing flood would wash away crops all along the river, threatening the very survival of the entire region.

This emergence of larger social systems also inevitably led to the emergence of a new kind of leader who was not simply the best hunter or fighter, but who was good at what we would call strategic planning and decision-making. The leader then needed people below them (read ‘managers’) who did the organizing and controlling. Just think, all this was in place centuries before the shop floors of the Industrial Revolution.

Moses and Jethro: The First Recorded Coaching Consultation for Large-Scale Change

What may be the earliest written account of ‘consulting for organizational change’ can be found in the biblical story of an exchange between Moses and his father-in-law, Jethro. (See Exodus 18:13-27.) Moses had just led the motley bunch of former slaves through the desert, turning South after escaping Pharaoh’s army to rest awhile in Jethro’s domain, the Land of Midian. Moses was probably there to check in on his new wife, Leah. Just a thought, but since Jethro was a Midianite, he would be seen by the client (Moses) and the client system (the Hebrew people) as ‘from out of town,’ and therefore perceived as neutral regarding substantive issues and solutions. (One of Richard Walton’s criteria for predicting a consultant’s effectiveness. . .) As the ancient tale goes, caught in a state of complete overwhelm, Moses turns to his father-in-law, Jethro, for help.

Now, we don’t know what exactly happened back then in that conversation, but here is one paraphrase:

  • ‘I can’t handle it any more!’ Moses says one night to Jethro.
  • ‘What’s the problem?’ says Jethro, caring deeply about this wild man who is married to his favorite daughter.
  • ‘I’ve just got too many people coming to me for decisions and advice. All day long. . . It’s all I do now. Hundreds of people bringing me every little problem they have, wanting a decision or a judgment. It’s driving me crazy! I’m exhausted. . . What can I do?!’
  • Jethro thinks for a while and says, ‘Yes. . . This is going to be a problem all along your journey, son. People are going to want solutions from you as long as you are their leader. . .’ He thinks some more. ‘Well. . . How about this? What if you set up some of your best decision-makers to be responsible for a hundred people, and a few of your very best to be responsible for a thousand people. That way, some handle the little stuff, others handle the not-so-little stuff, leaving you to take care of the really big stuff.’
  • ‘Hey!’ says Moses. ‘I like that!’ and he did what Jethro suggested, creating a hierarchical organization much like the one you probably work in—or consult to—today. (Only it sounds like Moses had a slightly wider span of control. . .)

There is a lot about OD consulting, albeit the more traditional ‘expert’ variety, embedded in this ancient vignette:

  • There was real-world pressure for change, and sufficient dissonance in the client. Moses is hard-working—you might say even driven—and is experiencing some strong dissonance between his idea of how this wilderness trip was supposed to go and what was actually happening.
  • They had sufficient mutual trust for this conversation. Jethro is older, more experienced, knows his way around, and is someone Moses respects.
  • Jethro had the emotional distance and clarity to help his client from behind a solid boundary. He didn’t get reactive to Moses’ complaining.
  • Moses was trapped inside his old paradigm—the one that came out of his promise to Yahweh about getting everyone to the promised land all by himself—and couldn’t see his way to a solution.
  • Moses asked for help. The feedback and coaching was requested. This opened Moses’ heart and mind to receive his coach’s radical idea. (The typical hierarchical organization chart that he recommended is so familiar to us today that we fail to understand just how strange that proposal would seem, especially to someone who thought he had to do it all. . . alone. . . for Yahweh.)
  • Jethro first affirms what will not change in the situation. He stands in reality, not in ‘pie-in-the-sky’ thinking. ‘Yes, Moses, these people are going to keep coming to you—or someone—for a long time. . .’ (This observation is from the creative theologically-trained mind of OD consultant and good friend, Mike Murray.)
  • Jethro then suggests something for Moses’ consideration. He doesn’t try to force or ‘sell’ his idea. It is an offering, not a command. Like a good consultant, he offers an idea, he did not use positional power with his client (which he would have had as a father-in-law in those days), but rather relied on the validity of the idea itself.
  • Moses acts on the coaching. He sets up the organization suggested by Jethro and sees it through.

So we OD consultants of the last 50-60 years are not the first in history to attempt to improve the quality of leadership and/or the effectiveness of the organizations around us. Written records are not available for many others, but surely kings and princes and religious leaders around the world had advisors they would turn to from time to time for help in matters military, economic, spiritual or political—or maybe even personal. Just as today, we can look back in time and see what a leader has decided—and the results. What we can’t see is the process by which that decision came into being—and who contributed.

There was the court jester who played a very important role in the medieval halls of power. The jester’s job was to hold up a mirror, playfully, to make a point in such a way that decision-makers and their hangers-on could laugh at what they saw. Then, on reflection, the more thoughtful participants could possibly see the folly in a particular decision or situation, and either change it or do things differently next time. If we think getting fired by a client is bad news, imagine what our ancestors faced every time they pushed the leader’s face in their own mess!

These historical attempts to have more effective organizations were missing several important ingredients, especially the distinction between content—where most of the above ‘consulting’ almost certainly focused—and process, something yet to be discovered. It was up to the unique exploration of more recent minds and hearts to discover and apply the principles that launched what we would recognize today as Organization Development.

Let’s take a look at some of the ‘heavy’ contributors in the next blog. . .

? What’s your reaction to this history of OD?

Reference List of Books from This Series

For More Resources About Organization Development, see These Free Management Library Topics:

John Scherer is Co-Director of Scherer Leadership International, and Billie Alban is President of Alban & Williams, Ltd. This blog is an adaptation of their chapter in the ‘bible’ of the field of OD, Practicing Organization Development (3rd Edition, 2009, Rothwell, W.J., Stavros, J.M., Sullivan. R.L. and Sullivan, A. Editors). Many colleagues contributed, among them Warner Burke, John Adams, Saul Eisen, Edie Seashore, Denny Gallagher, Marvin Weisbord Juanita Brown and others. They have drawn heavily from Weisbord’s wonderfully rich, easy-to-read, and well-documented description of the origins of the field in Productive Workplaces (1987 and revised in 2012).

Executive Remuneration – A View from the UK

Money bills

(This is a guest post by Nick Lindsay of Elemental CoSec)

In recent years, executive remuneration has moved from its traditional ambit of corporate governance circles and company secretary forums to the public eye. In the UK, the last six months, has seen a particular focus on what many in the media see as ‘excessive executive pay’.

At the end of January 2012, Stephen Hester the chief executive of the Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS) was forced to waive his bonus of nearly £1 million in shares. This was shortly followed by Fred Godwin (the former boss of RBS) being stripped of his knighthood following controversy over his remuneration.

RBS is a special case as it is majority owned by the UK government (having been bailed out), but criticism over executive pay in general is rife. This culminated in the UK government announcing various measures that they hoped would curb executive pay going forward. The UK government is currently consulting on most of these but the framework is clear enough and I suspect the similar measures will be adopted in many other Western countries to the extent they haven’t already.

Proposed UK Measures on Executive Remuneration

1. Greater transparency over remuneration reports:

The UK government wants to mandate a standardised form for remuneration reports with the aim of making them simpler and easier to understand. There will be one section setting out the company’s future remuneration policy for executives and a second section setting out how the previous year’s pay policy was implemented.

The government also wants a single number included in the report for how much each executive was paid in the previous year and what the maximum is that they could be paid in the following year. However, this will lead to the difficult question of how to value long term share options and similar forms of remuneration. Presumably a standard method of valuation will be required but we have yet to receive any information on this.

2. Forward looking binding vote on pay policy:

UK shareholders will get a binding vote on the pay policy for the upcoming year. What is unclear is what level of approval will be required to pass the vote (50% or 75%) and what happens to the executives’ pay if the vote is lost.

3. Backward looking advisory vote on pay policy:

Similar to the current situation in the UK, shareholders will have an advisory vote on the implementation of the previous year’s pay policy. A binding vote was considered but rejected because of the legal issues if the vote was lost.

4. Director’s notice periods greater than one year:

In line with the current UK Corporate Governance Code, shareholders will get a vote on any notice period for a director greater than one year which, in practice, is likely lead to any such notice periods disappearing.

5. Exit payments:

Shareholders will get a vote on any exit payments greater than one year’s basic salary or the minimum contractual amount (whichever is the greater). This is meant to stop, so called, rewards for failure but could lead to some interesting votes as one years’ basic salary can (relatively speaking) be quite low when a large part of an executive’s remuneration is often made up of performance related pay.

6. Ban on Executives servicing on Remuneration Committees:

Although it is a relatively rare practice, there will be a ban on serving executives of one FTSE company sitting on the remuneration committee of another FTSE company. This is to stop the perceived conflict of interest that could arise from this situation.

7. Remuneration Consultants:

Companies will have to disclose details around any remuneration consultants they use which will probably include, how they are appointed, to whom they report and whom they advise and their fees.

8. Clawback provisions:

The government has asked the Financial Reporting Council (the body responsible for the UK Corporate Governance Code) to consult on introducing provisions in the Code mandating companies to have claw back provisions for directors pay. Presumably this will be for the performance related parts of a director’s pay if the long term performance of the company doesn’t meet expectations.

The UK government is also supporting a new institution called the High Pay Centre which is a (non-governmental) body set up to monitor executive pay and evaluate if these provisions are making any difference.

Conclusion

I suspect that these proposals will make some minor differences, especially around exit payments for leaving directors which often cause the greatest media controversy. They will also lead to some interesting headlines when companies publish a total figure for the remuneration awarded to the top executives.

However, in the majority of cases the main driver of executive pay is not corporate governance or lack of shareholder oversight, it’s the global market. Until this starts to change, executive pay will, broadly, keep operating as it has done recently.

This article has been provided by Elemental CoSec for informational purposes only and should not be relied upon as specific advice or acted upon without seeking specific legal advice.

How to Avoid “Toxic” Coaching

A superior showing his subordinate what to do on a document

This is a guest post from coach and consultant, Dean Middlebrook of Management Development & Marketing at Canon Europe Ltd.

(Although the following blog post mentions therapists and clnicians, the guidelines are useful to anyone who is interested in using coaching for themselves, even if they aren’t interested in seeking professional levels of competence in coaching.)

In a clinical setting the terms ‘shadow of the therapist’ and ‘wounded healer’ are often used synonymously to describe an unhelpful and un-therapeutic relationship where the clinician misuses the client relationship to work through his/her their own healing needs. The focus moves away from the client’s needs and towards the helper’s emotionally unhealthy and potentially harmful agenda.

Now, of course, the coaching relationship isn’t generally a therapy; however, the idea of the ‘shadow of the coach’ and the ‘wounded coach’ are compelling topics that I think need to be raised in coaching development programmes. And upon reflection, I’ve observed toxic coaching is the following forms:

1) Need to control the agenda within the client relationship
2) Need to create an unequal balance of power within the coaching relationship
3) Need to take responsibility for the solutions to a client’s difficulties
4) Need to create a relationship of dependency between the coach & client
5) Need to take on the role of ‘saviour’ and ‘rescuer’
6) Need for client to praise, respect, adore, and flatter the coach
7) Need to instruct, sermonize, direct, and give advice
8) Need to feel superior
9) Relishes in the power of the coaching role without sufficient training and supervision
10) Over indulges in too much self-disclosure
11) Expects gratitude on the part of the client
12) Becomes defensive, resentful or aggressive when challenged by clients
13) Takes coaching relationship into the therapeutic realm
14) Probes without clear ethical boundaries
15) Pathologizes a client’s problem
16) Always blames the client when the coaching relationship breaksdown or when the relationship fails to show meaningful outcomes (refuses to take any responsibility for the failure to achieve meaningful outcomes)
17) Misuses knowledge to assert authority
18) Intellectualizes issues as way of asserting credibility and respect (i.e. “I’m smarter than you, so you had better listen to me”…or, “I know you better than you know yourself”)

What do you think? Can you add anything to the list?

For many related, free online resources, see the following Free Management Library’s topics:

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Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD – Authenticity Consulting, LLC – 800-971-2250
Read my blogs: Boards, Consulting and OD, and Strategic Planning.

The CFC: Leadership Development & Charity Fairs

Staff members involved in CFC campaign

In this and the next several CFC posts, we’ll examine some of the steps that you and your organization can take to benefit from participation in the CFC, in addition to those activities that generate revenue.

One challenge that many non-profits face is how to provide real opportunities for their staff members to develop their professional skills in a meaningful manner. And one of the huge benefits of participating in workplace giving campaigns is that they can be an integral part of your non-profit’s leadership development program.

These are just some of the skills that can be developed by participating in CFC campaigns:

Oral Communication/public speaking skills – you can practice your “elevator speech” dozens of times in the course of a campaign.

Team Building – the non-profit program officer can get practical experience in creating and leading a team, whether they are paid staff or volunteers.

Listening Skills – your team will have the opportunity to listen to hundreds of people in your community – what are they saying, what’s most important to them, etc. These are your potential donors and supporters – does your mission resonate with them, are they aware of your organization?

Written Communication – there are many opportunities to develop one’s writing ability, from simple memos to analyses (of the comments from community members) prepared for the nonprofit’s leadership.

Where sports teams have team meetings, playbooks, exercise regimens, etc, they also have a place where they practice what they’ve learned. For CFC charities that use workplace giving as a means of leadership development, a particular type of CFC special event, the Charity Fair, is that “practice field or rehearsal hall.”

Charity Fairs are held by a sponsoring Federal agency, and most will have between ten and twenty charities set up in a large room (like a cafeteria or auditorium), and will last from two to four hours (similar to a Job Fair, but without resumes).

By having your staff members and/or volunteers participate in charity fairs at the different Federal agencies, you give them the opportunity to do three things:

Tell your story.

Meet and listen to potential donors.

Distribute literature and other promotional items with your message/URL on them.

Early each year, you can assign a staff person to determine which promotional items would make the most sense for your organization, and what the costs would be for each item.

Here are a few key points, regarding promotional items, from a presentation by Jeff Brown, of America’s Charities, given at a workshop he and I presented at the Foundation Center last September:

Size Matters: They don’t need to be gigantic. Some of the more effective items are as small as pens or tubes of lip balm.

Be Visible: Put your organization’s logo/name on the item, and include a website URL to make it easy for potential donors to further research your organization.

Quality is Important: Don’t use items that appear to be cheaply made. They will not only reflect on your name and reputation, but they tend to break easily and reduce the time span of your brand promotion. And, handing out pens that work once before running out of ink doesn’t say good things about your organization.

It can be important that your promotional items, in some way, tie to your non-profit’s mission. For example, for years the Community Health Charities handed out a small band-aid box, designed to be kept at one’s desk. It had their name, the CFC code number, their URL and phone number, and people never threw it away! Compare that to your typical paper brochure!

Assign/tackle this project now, so you will have enough time to select and obtain the items well before you need them for a charity fair.

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During his 25-year career in the Federal sector, Bill Huddleston, The CFC Coach, served in many CFC roles. If you want to participate in the Combined Federal Campaign, maximize your nonprofit’s CFC revenues, or just ask a few questions, contact … Bill Huddleston

Basic Guidelines to Reframing — to Seeing Things Differently

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Reframing is seeing the current situation from a different perspective, which can be tremendously helpful in problem solving, decision making and learning.

Reframing is helping you or another person to more constructively move on from a situation in which you or the other person feels stuck or confused.

The aim of reframing is to shift one’s perspective to be more empowered to act – and hopefully to learn at the same time.

Many times, merely reframing one’s perspective on a situation can also help people change how they feel about the situation, as well.

Many fields regularly use reframing, including therapy, coaching and even marketing and sales. Techniques of reframing can also be used to cultivate creative and critical thinking skills.

When working to reframe perspective on a situation, consider the following basic guidelines. Keep in mind that, even though the following examples are about another person’s comments, you can use the guidelines to shift your own perspectives, as well.

Shift from passive to active

For example, if the other person said, “I really doubt that I can do anything about this,” you might respond, “What is one small step that you might take?”

Shift from negative feeling to positive feeling

For example, if the other person said, “I don’t want to work on that now because it makes me feel sad,” you might respond, “What small part of that might you work on for now, that might even leave you feeling a bit more happy?”

Shift from past to future

For example, if the other person said, “I’ve never been good at public speaking,” you might respond, “If you imagined yourself to be successful at public speaking, how would you be speaking that would be successful?”

Shift from future to past

For example, if the other person said, “I can’t seem to get started on achieving this goal,” you might respond, “Has there been a time in the past when you achieved a goal and, if so, what did you do back then to be successful? How might you use that approach now?”

Shift from others to oneself

For example, if the other person said, “They don’t seem to like me,” you might respond, “What do you like about yourself?”

Shift from a liability to an asset

For example, if the other person said, “I’m such a perfectionist,” you might respond, “How might being a perfectionist help in your job and life, though?”

Shift from victimization to empowerment

For example, if the other person said, “That always seems to happen to me,” you might respond, “Sometimes we even do that to ourselves. Perhaps it’d be useful to explore if you’re somehow doing that to yourself, too?”

Can you think of other examples of reframing?

For many related, free online resources, see the following Free Management Library’s topics:

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Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD – Authenticity Consulting, LLC – 763-971-8890
Read my blogs: Boards, Consulting and OD, and Strategic Planning.

Why Should Practitioners Know Their Paradigms, Theories and Models?

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Why It’s Important for Us to Know Our Paradigms, Theories and Models

Paradigms, theories and models – we all have them and work from them. Many of us don’t know it. But we really should.

When we practitioners in human development (consultants, coaches, trainers, etc.) come to conclusions about our clients and their organizations, we should closely examine those conclusions. Are they accurate? Are your client’s accurate? What did you see in your client’s situation? What might you have missed? What were your assumptions about the situation? Were they valid? What do you know that might not be so?

The more we practitioners can understand and clarify our paradigms, theories and models, the more we can learn about ourselves and the more effective we can be in our practice. Also, the more we can explain to our clients and learners about what we do and why.

The overall field of human development has grown rapidly, especially in recent decades. Accordingly, so have different perspectives and opinions, including about the following terms. The terms paradigm, theories and models are highly related and integrated. As important as coming to any standard definition of each is the readers coming to their own definitions. Obviously, the following opinions are but mine.

So, What’s a Paradigm?

The term “paradigm,” especially in the broad field of human and organization development, refers to our overall way of seeing things – our overall way of thinking about something.

For example, my field, the field of Organization Development (OD), often suggests a new paradigm about organizations. Many OD professionals assert that it’s no longer useful to have an overall “mechanistic” view of the organization – as if it’s a machine with various parts that must be controlled in a top-down, highly centralized and controlled manner – as if employees are motivated primarily by external forces, such as authority and money. These professionals assert that, because of today’s very diverse and rapidly changing world, organizations must constantly learn and adapt.

Therefore, these professionals assert that we must undertake a “paradigm shift” to a more organic view of the organization – that the organization must constantly be changing and that this change comes from more decentralized designs that empower people to act and learn at the same time.

  • What’s your paradigm on organizations and people? Families? Economies?

Well, Then What’s a “Theory”?

A theory is a suggested explanation of why something occurs as it does. It suggests causes and effects. Our overall view on the world – our paradigm – greatly influences what theories we choose to learn and use. Our theories, in turn, influence our paradigms.

Perhaps the field of psychology is the best example to use here because those theories are often the basis for how we consultants, coaches and trainers work with people and organizations. We’re familiar with many of the theories of how people behave.

For example, there’s theories on what motivates people. Theory X suggests that people are naturally lazy and dislike work, so they need to be closely monitored and directed. The Theory suggests how we should design organizations and supervise people. We can see how this theory is closely aligned with the mechanistic paradigm.

Theory Y suggests that people enjoy satisfying and fulfilling work, and are self-motivated. Thus, if work is designed to be satisfying and fulfilling for them, they don’t need to be closely monitored and directed. Theory Y is closely associated with a newer paradigm on organizations and people.

Some people group theories into overall types of theories. For example, various theories in the field of psychology are often the overall types of theories held by consultants, coaches and trainers. The psychoanalytic theories (developed by Sigmund Freud) derived those of Alfred Adler and Carol Jung. The adult development theories include the solution-focused therapy, which is often referred to by the field of personal and professional coaching. Another example is Systems Theory, which includes many theories about how systems work.

  • What theory or theories explain why you do what you do with your clients?
  • Can you explain them?

OK, So What’s a Model? (Sometimes Referred to as a “Framework”)

A model depicts a theory. It depicts the relationships, the causes and effects suggested by the theory. For example, many coaching schools that have the same paradigms and have similar theories, but differentiate themselves by using different models.

In coaching, one of the most popular models is GROW, which is an acronym for the phases of a coaching process, including 1) clarifying goals, 2) understanding the current reality, 3) identifying relevant and realistic options to address the goals, and 4) deciding what a person will do about the situation. The GROW model probably is aligned with various theories, but certainly seems to be with Theory Y and also with a newer paradigm on organizations and people.

Some people might refer to a model as a “framework,” meaning the phases or steps and their sequence. For example, many OD consultants refer to the action research framework, which has numerous variations based largely on the sequence of 1) doing a plan, 2) taking actions based on that plan, 3) observing the results and 4) reflecting on the results to learn from them, and perhaps to modify the original plan.

Theories and models often generate associated tools. For example, there are numerous systems tools associated with systems theories.

  • What are some of your models in your work?
  • Can you explain them?
  • Are they associated with any theory(s)?

What About Just Using Our “Gut Feel”? What’s Wrong With That?

Many practitioners might assert that they just operate by “gut feel” – they intuitively sense the situation, how to work with their clients, and what should occur as a result. They work almost unconsciously. Many practitioners are extremely successful with that approach.

The field of training and development often refers to stages of competences and how people must progress through them in order to achieve long-lasting development. The stages include:

  1. Unconscious incompetence
  2. Conscious incompetence
  3. Conscious competence
  4. Unconscious competence

“Gut feel” practitioners have somehow reached stage four.

But it can be extremely difficult to further develop one’s skills unless those developments go through the stages, as well. At some point, the practitioner must consciously recognize what he is doing and why in order to more fully develop their skills.

Here’s another reason to go beyond gut feel. There is increasing competition among practitioners in the fields of human and organization development. It helps tremendously if practitioners can clearly explain their models to potential clients in order to differentiate themselves from the increasing number of practitioners in the field of human development. Practitioners are not likely to be successful in this competitive environment if they explain that they go by “gut feel.”

  • If you are very successful at using “gut feel,” then perhaps there are theory(s) and model(s) behind your powerful intuition. Draft a basic model that describes the basic steps and their sequence that you use with clients. Then describe to yourself, especially why you use those steps and that sequence. So is that your “model” after all?

For many related, free online resources, see the following Free Management Library’s topics:

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Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD – Authenticity Consulting, LLC – 800-971-2250
Read my blogs: Boards, Consulting and OD, and Strategic Planning.

Useful Communications Skills — How to Paraphrase and Summarize

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Two very useful skills in communicating with others, including when coaching and facilitating, are paraphrasing and summarizing the thoughts of others.

How to Paraphrase When Communicating and Coaching With Others

Paraphrasing is repeating in your words what you interpreted someone else to be saying. Paraphrasing is powerful means to further the understanding of the other person and yourself, and can greatly increase the impact of another’s comments. It can translate comments so that even more people can understand them. When paraphrasing:

  • Put the focus of the paraphrase on what the other person implied, not on what you wanted him/her to imply, e.g., don’t say, “I believe what you meant to say was …”. Instead, say “If I’m hearing you right, you conveyed that …?”
  • Phrase the paraphrase as a question, “So you’re saying that …?”, so that the other person has the responsibility and opportunity to refine his/her original comments in response to your question.
  • Put the focus of the paraphrase on the other person, e.g., if the person said, “I don’t get enough resources to do what I want,” then don’t paraphrase, “We probably all don’t get what we want, right?”
  • Put the ownership of the paraphrase on yourself, e.g., “If I’m hearing you right …?” or “If I understand you correctly …?”
  • Put the ownership of the other person’s words on him/her, e.g., say “If I understand you right, you’re saying that …?” or “… you believe that …?” or “… you feel that …?”
  • In the paraphrase, use some of the words that the other person used. For example, if the other person said, “I think we should do more planning around here.” You might paraphrase, “If I’m hearing you right in this strategic planning workshop, you believe that more strategic planning should be done in our community?”
  • Don’t judge or evaluate the other person’s comments, e.g., don’t say, “I wonder if you really believe that?” or “Don’t you feel out-on-a-limb making that comment?”
  • You can use a paraphrase to validate your impression of the other’s comments, e.g., you could say, “So you were frustrated when …?”
  • The paraphrase should be shorter than the original comments made by the other person.
  • If the other person responds to your paraphrase that you still don’t understand him/her, then give the other person 1-2 chances to restate his position. Then you might cease the paraphrasing; otherwise, you might embarrass or provoke the other person.

How to Effectively Summarize

A summary is a concise overview of the most important points from a communication, whether it’s from a conversation, presentation or document. Summarizing is a very important skill for an effective communicator.

A good summary can verify that people are understanding each other, can make communications more efficient, and can ensure that the highlights of communications are captured and utilized.

When summarizing, consider the following guidelines:

  • When listening or reading, look for the main ideas being conveyed.
  • Look for any one major point that comes from the communication. What is the person trying to accomplish in the communication?
  • Organize the main ideas, either just in your mind or written down.
  • Write a summary that lists and organizes the main ideas, along with the major point of the communicator.
  • The summary should always be shorter than the original communication.
  • Does not introduce any new main points into the summary – if you do, make it clear that you’re adding them.
  • If possible, have other readers or listeners also read your summary and tell you if it is understandable, accurate and complete.

For many related, free online resources, see the following Free Management Library’s topics:

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Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD – Authenticity Consulting, LLC – 763-971-8890
Read my blogs: Boards, Consulting and OD, and Strategic Planning.