Author: Pam Solberg-Tapper

In a recent coaching conversation, my client wanted to work on “how to have more influence in his organization.” He felt that he was being overlooked for opportunities. He wanted to influence others more effectively in order to advance in his leadership role.

Here are some ways to influence others in the workplace to enhance your leadership impact:

• When new in a group or with individuals, introduce yourself right away.
• Expand your sphere of influence by cultivating strategic relationships.
• Know your audience, what is important to them and how will you provide value and benefit?
• Increase your level of contribution by making suggestions and sharing your ideas more often.
• Be well prepared with facts and data so you are more forceful in stating your opinions. Be sure to also give your perspective on why you believe the facts are valid.
• Develop conviction when stating your opinions and ideas – don’t hesitate. Pay attention to your vocal quality so you come across confidently.
• Summarize your opinions frequently to build understanding.
• Ask others for feedback on how they perceive you and what you could do differently to have a more positive impact.
• Show enthusiasm – the more committed you are, the more others will be willing to support you.
• Observe leaders in your organization or community who are highly influential. What are they doing that is effective?

Influencing others is a critical skill in today’s work environment. In what ways do you influence others to enhance your leadership impact?

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

By Guest Writer, Jay Tapper

Many coaches and clients find that work, family and community commitments take up the majority of their time. There seems to be little time left for themselves and their self care. They end up choosing to go with less sleep in order to manage their demanding schedules or they try to sleep and cannot.

Quality sleep reduces stress, provides growth and repair for the body, and improves your thought process. Sleep deprivation causes changes in mood and impairs decision making. Adequate amounts of sleep may vary from 6 to 10 hours depending upon the individual. More importantly, the quality of your sleep is more imperative than the quantity.

Here are tips to improve the quality of your sleep:

1. Avoid alcohol, caffeine and meals before bedtime
2. Allow yourself time to wind down before turning in
3. Take a hot shower before going to bed
4. Control your sleep environment (temperature, noise, lighting)
5. Learn and practice relaxation techniques
6. Stock up on sleep in preparation for future sleepless periods
7. Turn your clock so you can’t look at it during sleepless nights
8. Go to bed on a regular schedule

The result will be improved physical and mental energy that will take you to the next level.

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Jay L. Tapper, President of ActivEdge, “Keeping Fit in the Real World” ~715-393-8767 ~ www.activedgewi.com

By Jay L. Tapper, Guest Writer

Your level of fitness will influence the effectiveness of your coaching. Exercise, nutrition, and rest play a major role in providing the necessary mental and physical energy for you to be at the top of your game with your clients.

Prolonged positions and repetitive motions (sitting at desk, computer work or talking on a phone) cause loss of endurance, strength, and flexibility. Scheduling exercise into your day like other appointments will make you feel better. When you feel better your increased energy and enthusiasm will be passed on to your coaching clients.

The following are some exercise suggestions to incorporate into your day:

1. Take stretch breaks to offset prolonged positions and repetitive motions.
2. Keep hand weights at your office and utilize them three days per week to increase your muscle strength.
3. Participate in cardiovascular exercises 30-60 minutes per day to increase your endurance.
4. Practice good posture

Improving your exercise habits will improve your endurance, strength, and flexibility. A healthy body leads to a healthy mind. Be fit and be your best.

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Jay L. Tapper, President of ActivEdge, “Keeping Fit in the Real World” ~715-393-8767 ~ www.activedgewi.com

One of my executive coaching clients has been struggling with perfectionism. She strives for the impossible and disappoints herself when she does not achieve it. This caused her tremendous stress leading to feelings of guilt and failure when things did not turn out as she expected.

She realized that her perfectionism made her rigid and caused her angst. Through our coaching, she discovered a more empowering perspective which is to be her “best” versus trying to be “perfect”. Being her best was attainable while being perfect was not.

With her new strategy of operating from the perspective of being her best, she is able to let go of judging herself and is freed from the restraints of perfectionism. She’s pleased knowing that “being her best” is her “best self”.

Here are some traits of perfectionism:

• Unrealistic expectations of yourself and others
• Continuously trying to refine a project even when the stakes are low
• Criticism derails you
• Excessive focus on mistakes
• Fear of failure
• Negative self talk

Here are some ways to temper perfectionism

• Strive to be your best in a situation versus being perfect
• Set realistic expectations and flexible time frames for the achievement of goals
• Use mistakes as learning opportunities versus judging yourself
• Avoid spending excessive amount of time on low payoff tasks
• Monitor “all or nothing” thinking

Are you a perfectionist?

Try this informative quiz from About.com: Quiz: Are You a Perfectionist?

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

In today’s business world, it is imperative to be able to disagree with tact and professionalism. My coaching clients find themselves in situations where they disagree with others, yet need to rely on these same people to get work done. The way you tell someone that you disagree really matters. Agreeably Disagree is a helpful technique that lets you disagree with someone without damaging the relationship.

Here are 4 Steps to Agreeably Disagree:

1. Listen – avoid cutting people off. Never tell them they are wrong – hear them out.

2. Acknowledge the other person’s idea/opinion/point of view by saying something like:

“I hear what you are saying”

“You have some points that make sense”

“I have not thought about it that way”

“That is an interesting perspective”

“I can see why you see it that way”

“I understand why you say that”

“I hear where you are coming from”

Be aware of your body language. Your words need to be congruent with your actions. If you roll your eyes while acknowledging, they will not believe that you are earnest.

3. Pause briefly. Use silence effectively. Do not start out with “but, however, nevertheless”. These negative filler words will negate the fact that you are trying to hear them out. They often put people on the defensive and break down the communication.

4. State your idea/opinion/point of view by starting out with something like:

“In my experience, I…”

“My understanding is different. I …”

“Have you considered…”

“What about…”

“The literature/evidence says…”

“Because of …, I think…”

“The data I collected shows…”

Be sure to include evidence, facts, examples, personal experience, or data to substantiate your viewpoint.

By using the Agreeably Disagree technique, you preserve and strengthen the relationship by showing the other person that you heard them and respect them – even when you disagree.

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

In today’s workplace, “Managing Up” is essential if you want to avoid cutbacks or be considered for advancement. The term “Managing Up” refers to the process of intentionally working with your manager to obtain the best possible results for you, your manager and your organization. As I work with my coaching clients we strategize ways that they can “Manage Up” so their value is recognized within their organization.

Here are 5 musts that will help you “Manage Up”:

1. Design a working relationship with your manager. What is your communication strategy? Will it be face to face, email, phone? How often? What will the agenda be and who sets it? What happens if a meeting gets cancelled?

2. Understand your manager’s management style. Is your manager “big picture” or do they want the details? How does your manager manage under pressure? Know your manager’s strengths and weaknesses – how can you compliment and support them?

3. Know exactly what is expected of you and your performance. What will be measured and how it will be measured? Then focus your efforts to exceed expectations.

4. No surprises. Be sure your manager is informed. Let them hear bad news or good news from you first. Give a “heads up” if there is a potential problem – even if it does not materialize.

5. Ask for feedback. Know if you are on track. Proactively ask for feedback if you do not get it. A simple tool is to ask – “what should I do more of, less of and continue to do?”

What other ways can you “Manage Up”?

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

Listening is the primary tool in the coach’s toolbox. It is the foundation for developing rapport and producing an effective coaching session that yields results.

Here are 5 tips that will ramp-up your listening skills and enhance your communication:

1. Focus like a cat – notice how a cat has laser focus on their interests. They are keenly aware of what they hear and what they see. They are fully concentrating on their target.

2. Listen for key words – pay attention to the significant/important words you are hearing from the speaker – these are the doorways for understanding what is being said.

3. Repeat what you hear in your mind – when listening silently repeat each word that is said in order to stay connected to the message. When you notice your mind wonder, do it again.

4. Beware of assumptions – ask for clarification when you do not understand what is being said. Making an assumption can lead to misunderstandings.

5. Be authentic – others can tell if you are genuinely interested in what they have to say. They are able to tell if you are “really listening” or “faking listening”. When you “fake it” trust erodes and rapport diminishes.

What listening tips work well for you?

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

An effective way to start out the 2011 New Year is to Reflect on 2010 and set Intentions for 2011. I created this easy, simple worksheet for my coaching clients to capture their “Reflections” and “Intentions” as they embrace the New Year ahead. Try it and let me know what you think.

Reflections of 2010

• What are my wins and successes? What did I learn from these?
• What are my disappointments? What did I learn from these?
• Who do I wish to thank?

Intentions for 2011

• What do I intend to accomplish? What are my 3 most important priorities?
• What will I start doing?
• What will I stop doing?
• What will I continue to do?
• Who will be on my team?

I suggest reviewing your Intentions at least weekly so that you stay on track with what is important to you. Recognize that what you think about expands – so set strategy, and keep focused to get the results that you intend.

All my best to you and your loved ones for a happy, healthy and successful year ahead!

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

Executive Coaching is on the rise as a way to positively impact business performance. The Denisoff Consulting Group (of which I am a member: The DCG Coaching Cadre Team) recently published a complimentary white paper.

This white paper Business & Management Consulting – Denisoff Consulting Group covers important Executive Coaching topics such as: addressing the tangible benefits of utilizing executive coaches; 3 general areas where coaching is particularly effective (supporting strategic initiatives; leading deep cultural change efforts; and leadership development); as well as how to introduce coaching within your organization.

According to the authors, “When an organization decides to bring coaching to their leadership team, it is critical that they do so in a very intelligent and thoughtful way. The keys are to fully understand the impact of coaching, design a plan to implement a coaching process and connect coaching to the other business and developmental initiatives in place. By doing so, the organization will realize the payoff and many benefits that Executive Coaching can offer.”

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330

When I talk with people they state they are disappointed that sometimes they do not accomplish their goals – a promotion, start a business, run a marathon, go back to school, or whatever they set their sights on. They have great intentions and mean well, but they fall short on execution. What they set out to do doesn’t happen.

Accountability is one of the reasons why coaching works – clients have a partner to help them stay committed and take action on what is important to them. My clients tell me that our coaching check-ins help them keep their momentum.

Here’s a tip – if you do not work with a coach, I suggest getting an Accountability Partner – someone who will help keep you focused and in action. Another option is to form small groups of trusted colleagues that meet on a regular basis – Accountability Groups. You will find that you will be more successful in accomplishing what you set out to do when you stay accountable to someone.

Who will be your Accountability Partner?

For more resources, see the Library topic Personal and Professional Coaching.

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Pam Solberg-Tapper MHSA, PCC – I spark entrepreneurial business leaders to set strategy, take action, and get results. How can I help you? Contact me at CoachPam@cpinternet.com ~ Linkedin ~ 218-340-3330