Stop at the red and go on the green. Wait your turn. Treat others the way you would like to be treated. Certain timeless rules are better obeyed than broken. But are there certain rules that may need to be broken?

In today’s constantly changing business world, many of the rules that guided previous generations of managers may no longer apply, or at least, be as relevant.

“If you’re not breaking rules on a regular basis, your customers and markets are going to somebody else. So look, listen and change.”

So said a business client during a recent staff retreat. She wanted everyone to know that the task of managers and supervisors can no longer be just seeing that things get done in a timely manner. They have to do more than that!

Rather, effective managers today must be committed to do new things and do routine things in new ways. It comes down to breaking some long standing rules of managing people and organizations. Here are some examples.

Old rule:Strive to maintain the status quo, but react quickly when change happens.
New rule: Don’t wait for change to hit you. Anticipate it, plan for it, and make it happen on your terms.

Old rule: Management’s job is to make decisions.
New rule: Management’s job is to facilitate decisions made by those closest to the customer or the situation.

Old rule: Avoid conflict at all cost. People can’t handle it.
New rule: Create conditions that get people to grapple with different perspectives which will lead to better solutions and results.

Old rule: Tell employees what to do, when to do it and how to do it.
New rule: Give employees the resources and support they need. Then stand back and let them do their jobs.

Management Success Tip:

Letting go of rules that have served you well can be difficult, but holding on to them can be fatal. Don’t allow yourself or your people to get comfortable with the status quo. Don’t get stuck thinking that what’s made us successful so far will continue to make us successful in the future.

Are there some rules that need to be broken or at least modified? Which ones? Let me know what you think.

Do you want to develop your Management Smarts?

• Build your skills with The Effective Manager.
• Sign up for Quick Wins: 101 Management Tips.
• Find performance boosters in the Smart Moves Blog.
• Fast track your leadership. Be part of a Success Team.
• Need a speaker? Get the Edge keynotes-webinars-workshops.
• Copyright © 2012 Marcia Zidle business and leadership coach.

(This information is based on the work of Parker Palmer, John Morefield, and Marcy Jackson, and inspired by the work of Parker J. Palmer and Center for Courage & Renewal . The information was written by Susan Kaplan, M.S.W. )

Value of Open and Honest Questions

(Part 2 of 2 will give guidelines for asking open and honest questions.)

Open and honest questions are a thoughtful pathway for inquiry and discernment, moving us beyond our normal patterns of communication. Often our questions are laden with advice, problem solving, or meeting our needs to be a “competent leader, good parent, or engaged Helping Professional”. Open & Honest Questions serve to invite a more spacious, authentic conversation. This discernment practice enables us to:

• Create a more authentic and deeper exploration of “a problem or question” for both the person talking and the one listening;

• Step away from our tendency to jump to solutions, assign blame, or otherwise approach our exchanges attached to a specific end (teaching with a specific goal in mind, defend what we know, problem solve, or respond as a “good facilitator” would);

• Invite a person to explore their own “inner teacher”, calling upon their own wisdom and knowledge of self. This builds capacity for their own leadership from within, by exploring their own assets, truth, questions, and answers. This invites a discovery of their own “hidden wholeness”. A person accesses their inner teacher by thinking about the situation in new ways, applying past learning and experience to now, while listening to both feelings and thoughts. This practice helps others think through on their own before/or instead of you giving direction or input;

• Support a deeper inner conversation within one self;

• Slow down the pace of our conversation and develops a deeper mutual engagement;

• Expand and deepen an exploration rather than narrow or restrict possibilities;

• Explore and “hold” important questions or complicated issues. This practice recognizes significant value in listening without judgment with a view for understanding instead of reacting with a quick, simple or incomplete answer for an immediate direction (that may make things worse in the long run);

• Use meaningful metaphors to reframe or help “step out” of the situation;

• Invite more authentic responses rather than second guessing the “right answer”;

• Changes the dynamic of our tendency to want to fix, “save”, change or give advice. In these responses, we see the person as “broken” or with deficits. Our new role is to create a safe and meaningful process in which we help the person access their own “hidden wholeness”.

—

How well are you getting everyone onboard the change train as it’s pulling out of the station?

Change creates uncertainty for employees about their job, their responsibilities, their livelihood. No matter the kind of change or the extent, it is crucial that leaders communicate with employees early, often and well.

Part I provided these first three steps: 1) Analyze your own feelings about the change; 2) Obtain the many facts surrounding the change; and 3) Decide when and how to communicate the news. Here are the last three steps for communicating change so that there will be less resistance and more commitment.

4. Explain the details clearly and confidently.
In many organizations, staff are notified of decisions but are not told the why, who, what, when, where and how. If they don’t understand the reasons, if they see no plan, and if they think it won’t work, then what happens is a lack of enthusiasm and commitment for the change. Here’s what you need to communicate.

• The “Why” – The reasons for the change.
• The “What” – Specifically what is changing and what is not
• The “How” – The plan of action for the change.

5. Emphasize the benefits but don’t over do it.
Highlight key benefits that are important to the particular staff member or team. A younger employee may relate positively to the extensive training that will accompany a change while one nearing retirement may not see that as a benefit at all. So figure out the “WIIFM” (What’s In It For Me) for each of your staff people or teams.

6. Finally anticipate and address their concerns.
When a manager announces a change, a staff person’s first concern is “How is it going to affect me?” Recognize that while the change is beneficial and needed, there may be legitimate problems and downsides to the change. Too often managers do not want to discuss the downsides or challenges. Resistance increases when this happens because to employees it feels like management does not care or is out of touch with reality. So determine ahead of time:

• What questions might be asked and concerns voiced about the change?
• How might you answer these questions and concerns honestly yet with optimism?

Management Success Tip:

Get a fast start. Work with your people to determine the best ways to make change work. Involve your staff in the planning, the rolling out and problem solving of the change project or program. There is no better time to get people’s commitment than right in the beginning.

Do you want to develop your Management Smarts?

• Build your skills with The Effective Manager.
• Sign up for Quick Wins: 101 Management Tips.
• Find performance boosters in the Smart Moves Blog.
• Fast track your leadership. Be part of a Success Team.
• Need a speaker? Get the Edge keynotes-webinars-workshops.
• Copyright © 2012 Marcia Zidle business and leadership coach.

First, What is Coaching?

Simply put, the purpose of coaching is to guide and support oneself or another to:

1. Clarify a current, important priority that the person wants to work on;
2. Identify relevant and realistic actions to address that priority;
3. Take the actions in the person’s work or life; and
4. Learn by reflecting on the coaching and the actions.

Coaching can be done in one conversation or as part of an overall coaching program. One of the clearest ways to distinguish the power of coaching is by comparing it to a typical conversation. In the following, let’s assume that Tom’s current priority is to improve his time management.

Example of a Short, Typical “Helpful” Conversation

Tom: Bob, can I talk to you for a couple of minutes? We’ve worked together for years. I have a time management problem. I just don’t get enough done in a day. What do you think?

Bob: Yeah, me, too. That’s hard for all of us. I know your boss. It’s time someone made him take control. Make him fix your problem. What’s with that guy anyway?

Tom: I’ve asked him for help, but he said everything on my todo list is important and that I need to get it all done. He makes me feel even worse. What do you do?

Bob: Wow, your boss can be a real jerk! I’m glad I don’t work for him. Maybe you should take a time management course. That’s an idea!

Tom: I’m already so busy. How am I going to find time to take a course?

Bob: I don’t know. I’m just giving you some ideas. Maybe you need to work more hours.

Tom: I’m already working 50 hours a week. If I work any more, I’ll just be taking time from my family. What do you do?

Bob: I don’t know. We all have a time management problem. Maybe you just forget about it for a while.

Tom: I suppose I just live with it like everyone else.

Bob: You’ve got about 10-12 people working for you, right?

Tom: I’ve got 12.

Bob: Dump some of your work on your people. Maybe they need to work harder. This place never hires enough people.

Tom: They’re already as busy as I am. I guess I just live with this.

Bob: How big is your budget – about one million?

Tom: Yeah, about one million?

Bob: Tell you what, go hire another employee – someone who’ll work even harder for you, OK? We need to get rid of the dead wood around here. Just do it.

Tom: I suppose. Whatever.

Example of a Short, Coaching Conversation

Tom: Jack, can I talk to you for a couple of minutes? We’ve worked together for years. I have a time management problem. I just don’t get enough done in a day. What do you think?

Jack: Tell me more. How did you conclude that you have that problem?

Tom: I never get everything done on my todo list. The more I get done, the more I end up adding to the list. I talked to my boss and he just said, “You need to get it all done.”

Jack: What would successful time management look like to you?

Tom: Well, I’d get everything done on my list.

Jack: How is that realistic?

Tom: It’s not, but what else am I going to do?

Jack: How do you like to solve problems like this? For example, do you like to talk to someone, make a list of pro’s and con’s, or read books about the subject?

Tom: Well, I do like to talk to a few people and to make a list of pro’s and con’s.

Jack: Who are some people you could talk to for help?

Tom: Well, I really think my boss owes me some advice – after all, that’s his job. Also, I have two co-workers who seem to feel good about how they manage time.

Jack: How would you approach them? Sounds like you already tried to talk to your boss, and that didn’t work out so well.

Tom: I’ll start first with my co-workers – and I’ll ask them for advice about approaching our boss, too.

Jack: When will you realistically be able to talk to them? You seem so busy.

Tom: This is really important to me. I’ll talk to my co-workers today to schedule time with them.

Jack: How will you fit them into your schedule, since you’re so busy already?

Tom: Jack, this conversation is helping me to realize that I’ve got to do something. I’ll make time to talk to them.

Jack: Sounds like you’re getting more perspective on this time management problem?

Tom: Yeah, maybe one of my problems is that I’m hoping some kind of fix will come along without my having to make time for it.

Jack: That’s a good insight, Tom.

Tom: Jack, this conversation was really helpful! You’re really smart!

Jack: Tom, the answers seemed to come from you, not from me.

Jack: What was helpful about this conversation?

Tom: I guess I really like the way that you just asked me good questions. It really made me think – and I realized that I’m smarter than I thought!

Jack: I’m glad to hear that! Thanks for being so honest in this conversation.

Jack: Know what you could do for me? After you’ve talked to your co-workers, tell me what you learned, not just about time management, but about yourself. Maybe I can use some of that learning for myself, too!

Tom: It’s a deal.

Summary – Notice How Coaching is Different?

In the coaching conversation:

1. Jack mostly just asked questions.
2. Jack’s questions were made to make Tom think – they weren’t merely questions that could be answered with “yes” or “no.”
3. Jack didn’t have to know much about Tom at all, in order to be really helpful.
4. The ideas and the actions came from Tom, not from Jack – that helps Tom to take ownership in his situation and to ensure his actions are realistic.
5. Jack affirmed Tom’s participation in the conversation – Tom was honest.
6. Jack helped Tom to learn from the conversation – he asked Tom to share his learning with jack.

James Carse has written a wonderfully provocative book on the nature of our interactions in the world[1]. His work is particularly relevant now, during the Solstice season, when all seems to pause, reflect, refocus, and, with the increasing light, return to growth and activity.

Leadership Quiz

– I approach leadership as a game to be won, with clear rules, goals, and opponents.

– I approach leadership as a game to be played with others in order to advance the play through our collaborative work and ensure its continuity over time.

If you picked the first, you are not alone. In fact, this is the leadership model that has been in play for the last 50 years at least. If you picked the second you are also in good company. Your peers are the trailblazers of the Internet world and Gen X corporate leaders. In either case, we are facing a world in which Finite Play (defined by option 1) limits our abilities to respond to the challenges and surprises 21^st Century leaders confront daily. The answer to this conundrum is not to jettison Finite Play, but rather to embed it into an Infinite Game.

Finite Games

Finite Games have three characteristics that I feel are key for leaders to understand, least they overuse this form of interacting with the world.

• Finite Games come to a definitive end. For example, promotion, profit, or beating your competition in market share. Like sports, these are games in which everyone can agree on who is the winner.
• This leads to the second important aspect of Finite Games: The rules and procedures are externally defined. This means that the rules cannot be changed during the course of play. Hence, these games are slow to adapt to changes in the environment or changes of context, both of which are important in business today. Additionally, the rules are different for each type of Finite Game. For example, leaders who are awesome on the shop floor may not do well in the home office, and promoting expert leaders into roles that require the people skills of a generalist can cause problems. Rule makers can also remove players at any time, especially when they are no longer needed for the game, very common during downsizing.
• Finite Games have definitive boundaries. These boundaries are designed to limit the players involved based on their skills, knowledge, and expertise , which are specific to the game being played. Hard boundaries produce silos, the rigidity of hierarchical organizational structures, and the inflexibility of jobs, roles, and titles (not my problem syndrome).

Infinite Games

In my mind, Infinite Games are where leaders can really shine, but they are inherently paradoxical and require an open, inquisitive mindset.

• Infinite Games are played for the purpose of continuing the play. These are the corporate games led by visionaries, strategic wizards, leaders who navigate turbulence, embrace surprise, and manage paradox by engaging with the game as it unfolds. Leaders who play Infinite Games transform organizations and develop (not just promote) those around them.
• The rules and procedures of Infinite Games are internally defined. As the environment and context in which the game is played changes, these change as well. In fact, the rules of Infinite Games are designed to deal with specific threats that would end or limit the game. This creates a system that is adaptive and resilient – encouraging learning and enlarging the pool of players to meet the demands of the situation.
• Infinite Games have soft, semi-permeable boundaries. Players form networks (formal and informal) and actively enroll others who can contribute. Players can self-select, coming and going as the game changes and the need for their skills and talents changes.
• Infinite Games can contain Finite Games. This changes the way the Finite Game and its players are perceived by leaders.

infinite players… enter into finite games with all the appropriate energy [but] without the seriousness of finite players. …For that reason they regard each participant in finite play as that person playing and not as a role played by someone.“ James Carse, emphasis the authors

Integrating the Two

Carse’s book presents a view in which ceaseless change is met with the continuity generated by Infinite Games rather than discontinuity generated by Finite Games. Leadership in this model is fluid, engaging our humanity and creativity in a form of play that can hold the rigidity of Finite Games and still advance the overarching Infinite Game. To blend the two requires a leader that, in the words of psychologist Edwin Friedman,

can shift [their] orientation… from one that focuses on techniques that motivate others to one that focused on the leader’s own presence and being.”[2]

Look back at the characteristics of Infinite Games; they fit with Friedman’s assertion that leadership is an emotional process rather than a cognitive process. To lead an Infinite Game requires one to have clarity about themselves and their own emotional processing. This allows them to manage their own reactivity when others around them are anxious and uncertain. To be sure, this is not easy. But neither is it available to only a few, any leader can improve their capacity for being present and connected to those around them.

This brings us back to the Solstice – the end of exhale … the pause before drawing a fresh new breathe of air. Is 2012 the year you begin playing the Infinite Game of leadership?

[1] Carse, James P. Finite and Infinite Games. Random House, New York. 1986.

[2] Friedman, Edwin H. A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of Quick Fixes. Seabury Books, New York, 2007.

How do you start out on the right foot so that everyone will get on board the change train quickly? No matter the kind of change or the extent, it is crucial that managers communicate with employees early, often and well.

When the change message is not well-defined and well presented, people tend to respond by sitting on the fence, dragging their feet or even worse sabotaging the change effort. Suddenly milestones not met, customers are upset and your stakeholders or shareholders start pounding on your door for better results.

The challenge for managers is to lessen, as much as possible, the potential speed bumps of change. Here are the first three steps for communicating change so that there will be less resistance and more commitment.

1. Analyze your own feelings about the change.
How we manage change can be dramatically affected by how we personally feel about the change. It is important to make the time and take the time to first answer these questions for yourself.

• How is this change going to affect me now? Later?
• Do I agree with the change or do I have reservations?
• After the change, what am I gaining? What am I losing?
• Finally, whom can I talk to abut my reaction(s) if I feel the need? At work? Away from work?

2. Obtain the many facts surrounding the change.
This is not the time to “wing it”. You must be very clear about the big picture and the small details.

• What’s changing and what isn’t? What’s going to change right now and what later?
• What’s the time frame? What other important details do I need to reassure my staff?
• How much control do I have over how the change is made? What’s negotiable? What’s not?
• Is their information I either don’t know or can’t share with my staff? How will I handle this?

3. Decide when and how to communicate the news.
The timing of the communication is very important. Consider when you are at your best as a communicator and when your employees are most apt to be receptive. What is the best time to talk with your staff? Will key people be there?

• How much lead time is necessary between the announcement and the actual change?
• Is there enough time for adequate planning but not too long to allow anxiety and resistance to build?
• What is the most effective way to communicate the news? Is it n a group meeting or one-on-one or in a memo or email or some other way?

Management Success Tip:

When you’re on an airplane and it encounters turbulence, you want to know what’s happening. Not knowing makes you nervous. Employees also want to know what’s going on. If they don’t understand, then anxiety mounts, trust declines and rumors fly. That usually leads to change resistance rather than change commitment. Part 2 will give you the next three communication steps.

Do YOU know how to lead right – motivate right – hire right – get the right results?

• Build your skills with The Effective Manager
• Sign up for Quick Wins: 101 Management Tips.
• Get performance boosters in the Smart Moves Blog.
• Copyright © 2011 Marcia Zidle business and leadership coach!

It’s very useful to conduct relevant and realistic evaluations of a group coaching or Action Learning program that is assigned to address a current, major “problem,” or priority, in life or the workplace. It’s best to even create an evaluation plan — ideally before the group(s) even get started — and to have the plan reviewed by people in charge of the priority to be addressed, sponsors (people officially assigned to manage the group program), facilitators and some group members. Be sure to specify what will be confidential during and after the evaluation.

Here’s basic guidelines about what to evaluate, what tools to use and what to present at the end of the program.

NOTE: This post addresses basic guidelines — resources for more in-depth information are provided at the end of the post.

What to Evaluate

1. Progress on the overall “problem” or priority that the group is chartered to address. So it’s good to also identify some “indicators” toward progress — some indicators that you can realistically and practically get data about.
2. Program goals — goals about starting and running a group coaching or Action Learning program, e.g., evaluate status toward achieving a goal to “Develop a group coaching or Action Learning Coordinator job description.”
3. Quality of facilitation process and tools so far, whether it’s an external or self-facilitated group.
4. Quality of each meeting, including attendance, participation, and coaching/feedback process and tools among members.
5. Quality of achievement of individual goals that each member sets for him/herself in the program.

Evaluation Methods

1. Quick verbal rating from each member in each meeting about the quality of that meeting, including why each member selected that rating, and what he/she could have done during the meeting to have gotten a higher rating now.
2. Questionnaires at the mid-point and end of the program, about the 5 items listed above and about the 6 items listed later on below.
3. Then selected interviews after the questionnaires, especially about best results, worst results and recommendations from members.
4. Optionally, case studies at the end of the program, especially about a best experience, worst experience and average/nominal experience in the program.

What to Present at the End of the Program

1. Description of the “problem” or overall priority they addressed.
2. Their “charter” or purpose as a group, i.e., the process they used, resources they were allocated, authority they were given, members of the set, any sponsorship from other roles in the organization, etc.
3. The actions they took between meetings.
4. The learnings they gleaned about the 5 items that were evaluated (listed above), and especially in terms of new knowledge, skills and perceptions — both expected and unexpected.
5. The final effect on the “problem” they addressed.
6. Ideally, any recommendations for future program and group activities.

As a manager, it is your job to ensure that the work gets done right, on time and on budget. If not, then you must correct the situation first coaching and then with discipline.

That may seem to you a time-consuming, unpleasant task but it’s part of your responsibility as a manager. If you don’t, it sends a definite message to your good workers that poor performance is acceptable. Is that what you want? Here are some common mistakes managers make in performance management particularly in dealing with poor or unacceptable performance.

1. Ignore the problem thinking it will get better.
You are counting on peer pressure to correct sub-stand performance. This rarely works and the staff grumbles about the ineffective way the issue is being dealt with.
2. Have a group meeting.
Instead of dealing directly with the problem employee, a meeting of the work group is held and standards of performance are repeated with the hope that the problem employee will get the hint. This is a waste of time for your “A” players and the person rarely gets the hint.
3. Transfer the poor performer.
When the person applies for a job in another department, you gives the employee rave reviews about this work performance. When the transfer is made, one supervisor gives a sigh of relief and the other just sighs.
4. Delegate it.
You give the task of dealing with the poor performer to a team member. This is not fair to the “good” employee because it is not that person’s responsibility…it’s yours. Nor is it fair to the problem employee because he or she may resent getting disciplined by a fellow team member.

Here’s the right thing to do:
Make sure every position has specific requirements and if possible measurable standards. Then, when an employee is not meeting the requirements, deal with it immediately.

Here’s an example: A shipping clerk is required to process 25 shipments per day. If the employee is only processing 20 a day, the standard is not being met. You first review the job requirements. You then ask about what is preventing the person from meeting these requirements. Is additional training or resources needed? Finally together you and the person agree on a solutiion – what needs to be done to meet the job standards.

Management Success Tip:

Here are the five “T’s of effective performance management with a poor or marginal performer. 1. Target: Does the person know what’s expected? 2. Tools: Does he have the right equipment? 3. Training: Does he know how to do it? 4. Timing: Does he know when to start and finish? 5. Truth: Does he know why it is important? How well do you follow these when managing the performance of your people?

Do you want to develop your Management Smarts?

• Build your skills with The Effective Manager.
• Sign up for Quick Wins: 101 Management Tips.
• Find performance boosters in the Smart Moves Blog.
• Fast track your leadership. Be part of a Success Team.
• Need a speaker? Get the Edge keynotes-webinars-workshops.
• Copyright © 2012 Marcia Zidle business and leadership coach.

“We thought we were doing a good job in communicating with our employees. However, a recent survey indicated that over 50% felt frustrated because they were not receiving the information they needed to do their job well.”

When there is a communication gap between management and employees, it is usually due to:

1. Ineffective supervision.
Although communication is the most critically important supervisory skill, many enter the ranks of management due to their technical, not their people skills.
2. Poor information systems.
Organizations typically do a better job of planning the flow of materials and products than they do of information, which often slips through the cracks.
3. Lack of a cooperative spirit.
Without a strong spirit of teamwork and collaboration, employees are more apt to withhold than to share important information.to avoid communication gaps.

Here’s how to get the word out and prevent communication gaps.

1. Promote supervisors with good communication skills.
The ability to effectively communicate up, across, and downward is the most important supervisory skill. It should also be the most important factor in promotion decisions. Also provide communication skills training to everyone because communication is every one’s job.
2. Conduct an information-needs analysis.
For each position, outline what information is needed, from whom, and by when. Integrate the results of this analysis into the organization’s daily procedures.
3. Provide what employees need to do their jobs well.
From: management: What changes are taking place within and outside the company that will impact my job? How will this changes affect our priorities? What will be different?
From supervisors: What exactly do you want me to do? What resources do I have? When does it need to be complete? How am I doing? What do I need to do differently?
From coworkers: When will the work I need from you be completed? What are your expectations of me?

Management Success Tip:

Communicate, communicate, communicate. Develop a plan to move information quickly up, down and across the organization. Use staff meetings, special events, emails, voice mail, memos, intranets and even bulletin boards to get the word out. Remember, during times of change there is never “too much” communication.

Do you want to develop your Management Smarts?

• Build your skills with The Effective Manager.
• Sign up for Quick Wins: 101 Management Tips.
• Find performance boosters in the Smart Moves Blog.
• Fast track your leadership. Be part of a Success Team.
• Need a speaker? Get the Edge keynotes-webinars-workshops.
• Copyright © 2012 Marcia Zidle business and leadership coach.